i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
home. puking in laundry basket.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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