feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Randomize
