you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
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