She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Randomize
