I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize
