i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
I'm having to shit out rocks
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