can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
this must be what syphilis tastes like
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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