Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Randomize
