return my video game
u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
Randomize
