i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
