Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
my sisters under your porch take her home
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
