I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
