the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
