problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Randomize
