Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
