Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
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