is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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