even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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