So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
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