Its about making memories worth repressing
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
