so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
PS: I just woke up from my shower
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
