There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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