if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
