new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
You left your phone here
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