Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
