i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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