I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
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