what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
i would punch a child for taco bell
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Life without a bra equals bliss.
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
