i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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