Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Randomize
