You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
