i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
