I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Randomize
