No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Randomize
