my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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