just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Randomize
