You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
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