New low: just hacked my moms facebook
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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