If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
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