that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Randomize
