what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Randomize
