I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Come share oat with me in your robe
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
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