At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
She's the barista slut.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Randomize
