You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
