he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Randomize
