i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
Randomize
