The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize