You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
