Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
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