areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
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