at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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