Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
