____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
Can Purell be used as lube?
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Randomize
